Writing is probably the closest thing I’ve got to a talent, yet I’ve never really considered myself a writer. My 2 best friends, Tatin & Lia, now they’re great writers - and no, I’m not just being biased. They write for magazines, get published, and people acutally read their stuff - irrefutable proof that they’re fabulous writers, my bias aside.
Whenever I read their articles I feel a rush of pride: this was written by one of my best friends. How cool is that? But then I get a little twinge of jealousy; of the three of us, I’m the one who took English Literature in college and yet no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to write as well as they can.
But then during that useless (for the most part, at least) writing class I attended last Saturday, I realized that maybe I’m just a different kind of writer altogether.
At one point in the class the instructor brought up a topic, discussed it for a few minutes, then told us that we had 15 minutes to write about it after which we would read what we had written aloud to the class. Everyone else in the class opened up their laptops and started clicking away while I sat there with my jaw hanging open in absolute disbelief. I thought to myself: who in their right mind gives someone a topic and 15 minutes to write about it? That would be like giving a painter some paints and brushes and telling him, "Here. You have an hour. Paint about stars then display it on the wall." It was completely absurd!
As I walked back to the train station I continued fuming; just because someone is a lawyer and a journalist, doesn’t mean he can teach! That instructor is completely bonkers to think people can write on command. Nearly all my writing professors in college talked about how writing is a process that had to flow naturally and that forcing it is counter productive. Some, obviously the more artistic of the bunch, went as far as to say that we are not writers - rather, we are merely writers. That is to say that we do not create our pieces. There are things - realities - that need to be said, need to be written, need to substatiated and we as writers are simply the means by which these things come into existence. We merely write them down and are thus merely writers. This is why we cannot write on cue. We must wait for these realities to come to us; when there is a need for them to be expressed - and no sooner. I suppose this is why the ancients believe in muses.
As I was thinking of all that, it hit me that the reason why I can’t write articles as well as L & T and that the reason why I was the only one affronted by Mr. Lawyer/Journalist’s instructions of writing on the spot is because unlike those three and the rest of the class, I am a creative fiction writer. They all write articles or scholarly papers while I write poetry and plays; creative fiction is a completely different monster altogether that has its own processes.
Though I would never even dream of flattering myself by calling myself an artist, I was trained in writing by critically acclaimed poets, playwrights, and even national artists so I suppose its not entirely surprising that I subconsciously took on their methods, styles, and ideas of writing. Somewhere along the way I loosened my grasp on non-fiction writing and focused on creative fiction writing; I became an eccentric-artist-type writer without even realizing it - god help me!
So I suppose the class wasn’t entirely useless; my writing may not have improved an iota but it did help me realize that I should stop flagellating myself for not writing like T & L. It helped me realize that the stuff I write is different and can’t and shouldn’t really be compared. And yes, I may actually accept the label of "writer" - someday.
